Ask any girl who has attempted to shop in the arranged marriage market and she'll tell you half a dozen stories of first meetings that start and end in embarrassed grimaces and horribly awkward silences. I know I've lived through my share of them. But they're not all bad - and, yes, I speak from personal experience. The aim of a rishta meeting isn't to come out of it engaged after one measly conversation (hopefully), even if marriage is the end goal, eventually. To begin with, all you can hope for is a friendly conversation, without too many awkward questions or long pauses. And as the wedding season progresses, if you're single, we're sure that family and friends are scoping out eligible single men at the weddings, trying to arrange a match. If you're faced with the prospect of meeting a stranger for the purpose of future married bliss, here are 6 ice-breakers to take some of the pressure off of you, and them.
1. His Past And Future Travels
Who isn't a travel enthusiast these days? Travel is my favourite topic of choice during the awkward rishta conversations because it gives me an insight into his life and thoughts without seeming too intrusive and interviewer-like. How a person travels, where they like going, how they spend their time when they're in an unknown city, the food they like eating... All of it is a window to a person's personality and a great first step to gauging common interests and compatibility. Ask him when was the last time he took a holiday, where he went, where he would like to go for his next one. Everyone has an answer for these questions and the details are generally not too personal, so sharing doesn't feel weird.
2. Childhood Dreams And Stories
Ask him the funniest thing he ever did as a kid, or what he wanted to become when he was younger. Did he celebrate festivals and birthdays in a big way while growing up? Which one was his favourite? These are all simple enough questions and we're sure some of answers will lead to some shared laughs too.
3. What His Work Life Is Like
Since you know that you'll be quizzed after the meeting by your family for hours, this topic is a must, even if it isn't all that fun. Ask him about what he does, what kind of hours he keeps, how satisfied he is with his career. But don't push him to answer, and move on to another topic if he gets uncomfortable with discussing this in detail. We recommend bringing this topic up because it will help you gauge his reaction to your career and professional aspirations.
4. Where Does He Want To Be 5 Months Later
Everyone asks about five years later, so change things up a bit and ask him where he sees himself five month from now. It's also a very easy opening for him to flirt with you a bit if he likes. And if you're asking him this, make sure you have an interesting but honest answer ready, in case he asks you the same thing.
5. The TV Shows He's Currently Watching
In the age of Netflix and Amazon Prime if his favourite TV show is still Bigg Boss, you have our full permission to tease him endlessly. No, but seriously, once you go down this road, the conversation just never ends.
6. Weekend Hobbies
Ask him what he likes to do during his free time - but also be prepared for it to backfire. See, some people just don't have any interesting hobbies. They might have interests, but may not be actually pursuing them in any meaningful way. So if he doesn't give you a quick reply, alter your question to ask him what he would like to do if he had more free time.
PS: No matter how good you are at small talk, at the end of the day, it is an awkward situation. It is okay to acknowledge your self-consciousness. Maybe your mutually shared discomfort will become a bonding experience. Also, take everything they say with a pinch of salt. The number of times I have been assured their favourite hobby is reading only to find out later, on some quizzing, that by reading they meant exclusively Chetan Bhagat novels.... Sigh. Never mind.
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