Breakups are hard. If it's after a long term relationship, even more so. Even if and when you know it's probably a step in the right direction for you, there are very few of us who derive any happiness from breaking up with someone we might have once imagined a life with. It is difficult to part ways with someone who became an integral part of your life; someone you shared important and meaningful experiences with, discussed your goals and shared your secrets with. We understand. But life doesn't come to a halt after this person has exited your life for whatever reason. It's important to remember that too. There are ways in which you can help yourself get your life back together and reset your life.
1. Talk about your ex and the relationship, but productively
Constantly whining about how much you miss him, going through pictures of the two of you together and crying, it's not going to help. Instead, if you really need to talk about him, talk about why this might be the right decision for you. Sit with yourself and introspect about all the different ways in which this could be beneficial for you. If that's too hard to do, ask your friends to give you their perspective on that relationship and why they thought it wasn't right (preferably without bashing your ex). Sometimes, just listening to an objective third party opinion can ring a bell.
2. Take up a hobby
You know all that time you spent with your ex, wasting Sunday afternoons and midweek evenings, doing nothing at all? Well, now you have all that time to actually try something new. Join a book club. Take up a sport. Go take those music lessons you've been promising yourself you'll start for the last six months. Being in a relationship can take up a lot of your time and effort. With that space open in your life now, you get to try new and exciting things. Make the most of this opportunity.
3. Get social
All those times you ditched your friends and family to hang out with your ex, it's time to make up for that. Give the people who love you some undivided attention. Not only will it make them feel good (and get you some bonus points), but it will also help lift up your spirits like nothing else. Go out dancing with your girlfriends or for dinner with your siblings. Do what makes you happy, just as long as you don't stay cooped up in your bedroom.